The Caregiver Cup Podcast

Never-Ending Lemons: Finding Resilience in Caregiving

• Cathy VandenHeuvel • Episode 249

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We’ve all heard the saying, “When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.” But what if the lemons never stop falling? In this episode, we tackle the relentless challenges of caregiving—constant medical appointments, emotional strain, and the physical toll of caregiving. Drawing from personal stories and insights, we’ll share how to build resilience and find small moments of joy, even in the face of uncertainty and exhaustion.

You’ll learn Practical Steps to Navigate THIS SEASON, including:

  • Recognizing when you’re overwhelmed and finding ways to recharge.
  • Leaning into mindfulness practices to center your thoughts.
  • Adjusting and refining coping strategies that may need updating.
  • Finding small, meaningful moments of joy each day.
  • Establishing a support system to help lighten your load.

Caregiving may be relentless, but by building resilience and focusing on what you can control, you can find strength to keep going—and even rediscover happiness along the way.

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Speaker 1:

Hello, hello, my friend, and welcome to another episode of the Caregiver Cup podcast. It's Kathy here. I am so glad you're joining me today and I'm hoping that your caregiver journey is going well this week and if it's not, I think I've got some words of wisdom for you in this podcast episode. But if it is going good for you, embrace it. Embrace it, because we know challenges are just going to happen. Well, before we get started, I wanted to give a shout out to a couple of you who sent those text messages that you can click the link at the bottom of a podcast episode and send me a message, a question, a comment, your story, whatever you want to do, and I'm going to share a couple of these today because I haven't shared them in a while. But I wanted to go and give a shout out to the person that sent in from Anaheim. She said she's a first time listener. I'm so glad that I found you and that it came just at the right time for kicking off 2025. She says I've been a caregiver since 2012 to my husband who has brain cancer. Kudos to you for going ahead and finding me. Thank you, thank you, thank you. I am so glad that you're finding these helpful and oh my gosh helpful. And oh my gosh, you're over a decade into caregiving and I want to go ahead and just give you a virtual hug and tell you that you're not alone, and I know this journey isn't easy and I'm hoping that you can find moments of joy and memorable moments for you and your husband.

Speaker 1:

Okay, here's another one. I'm bringing them up on my email. This one is this person gave us her name because the app does not. The text does not give me your name or it does not give me your phone number. It just gives me your last four digits and the location that your phone number is serviced in. And this one is from Porterville, california. Her name is Sabrina. She's a 32-year-old caregiver mom out in California. She said I came across your podcast on the Apple app in search of help and resources on this new journey of mine.

Speaker 1:

I, along with my dad, have been a witness to my mom's long battle with multiple chronic illnesses and just recently have had to make significant changes. Since her health took a big hit in the past year, she, within the last few months, have been solely dependent on us both and it has been a struggle and adjustment for all of us. Your podcast sheds light on what all caregivers of the world have gone through on a daily basis. She gave a shout out to episode 239 with Kathy Gregory. Kathy if you're listening kudos Was so amazing and an eye opening when she explained the three I's of caregiving. She says thank you for being an advocate for us and making me feel seen Well. Thank you, sabrina, for sending in this message to us today. I am sending you all the positive vibes, the warm hugs and the resilience to keep going on, and I feel that this episode today may help you a little bit, since we're going to be talking about and exploring the ups and downs we feel as caregivers when our loved one is going through chronic illness, a terminal disease or an aging parent, all of these meaning that we know what the end results are going to be. It could be a long journey and they probably most likely will never be better, especially like you're dealing with an aging parent or terminal illness. You, as a caregiver, try to maintain your empathetic care, a positive attitude in your overall health during this journey. But let me just come out and say it's hard, isn't it? It's damn hard to go ahead and keep going when your loved one is dealing with this chronic illness, terminal disease or an aging parent that is diminishing.

Speaker 1:

This past week was one of those hard weeks for me. We were waiting on his bone marrow biopsy. He had it done on January 9th and our consultation wasn't until the 14th and we were just hoping that we would see the results before, but we didn't. We ended up going into the doctor on the 14th of January and he had said doctor had said we have good news the Hodgkin's that is being treated for chemotherapy is showing very little traces in his bone marrow. We were excited but it wasn't tackling the non-Hodgkins and the non-Hodgkins is now at 30%. Well, the stem cell transplant doctor that we saw said that the non-Hodgkins had to be at 10% or less for us to proceed on, which means that was a devastating blow for us. So Dennis can't move forward with his transplant and needs to continue his infusion or his IV chemotherapy and now has to add chemotherapy pills. It was just like we got a punch in the face and this leaves us with so much uncertainty and frustration and nobody can really tell us what the outcome is going to be. Will the chemotherapy pills work? We're hoping so. Science says it will. How much longer will he have to do both of these to keep? Will he have to do both of these to keep because he can't stop the chemotherapy, because the Hodgkin's is extremely aggressive, and will he be able to sustain all of this? And will the transplant happen? Now it's all of these uncertainties and doubts, uncertainties and doubts.

Speaker 1:

It took me a few days of terrible sadness, frustration, anger. Dennis and I had lots of conversations about our feelings, where each of us were at and the not so fun futuristic discussions of you know how long is this going to take? We had financial discussions. We had what if it doesn't work? Discussions. It was hard. When I was sitting in the thick of it.

Speaker 1:

I went through what I call the I wants and the I wishes. Let me share some of these with you, and I know you probably have some of these thoughts yourself or have had these. I was journaling these out just so you know. The first sets were about freedom in life. I want to be free and I want to have a life. I just want to. I want to have a life. I want to be able to go out and have a good time versus having our outing be going to the doctor's office all the time. The big outing that we have today is to go sit in a doctor's office. I want to give my money to other things. I am tired of giving all of my or all of Dennis and my hard-earned money to doctors, to hospitals, to pharmacies. I am so tired of that. But you know, that's the cards we were dealt. Another set of ones were on hope. I just have this wants and wishes and hopes that my loved one will be better. I'm hoping that the next drug they give him will cure his cancer. When I was dealing with my mom, I was hoping that that radiation therapy was going to cure her lung cancer, or I was hoping that the therapy and the antidepressants were going to cure her depression. So you know you'd have those.

Speaker 1:

And then I went into what I wanted for my well-being. I want to feel more than just sadness and frustration. I want to enjoy life and be happy. I just I want it. I, you know, I wish I had more energy too. I wish I had more energy too because you know that that's my word of the year because when I'm in this downward state, it just sucks my energy out of me and you have to go through it, and I'll talk about this in a second. You have to process it, but you can't stay there. I wish I just could get away too, and I want to get away without guilt and worry. But when is the right time to get away? Right now, when we're in the midst of the thick.

Speaker 1:

You know I want to rediscover who I am outside of being a caregiver. You know, you go to the grocery store, right? You go to the grocery store, you go somewhere maybe it's church or whatever and they see you and they don't see your loved one with you. And what do they say? How is Dennis doing? They don't ask you very much. They don't say how are you doing? Or, if they do, do you want to just hug them? I want to reconnect with my personal relationships, my own identity and my own interests. So those are some of the things that I just journaled out because I had to get them off my chest. I had to just take a sip of water here once.

Speaker 1:

If you feel this way, or you have other wishes or wants, I want you to know you are not alone, my friend. You are not alone. It's not selfish to want for yourself. It's essential to sustain your giving spirit. You have to sustain it, and it's not selfish, though, to want for yourself. You know there's a stat out there and I think the stat is really low from National Alliance for Caregiving. It says 53% of caregivers report their own health suffers due to caregiving. I think that is so low. I know caregivers out there that probably haven't gone to the doctor, that are suffering with their own health and well-being and probably don't admit it. But you know, think about it. How many of you have suffered from stress or body aches or gotten sick or, you know, have gained weight or lost weight or not eating well, whatever it would be. You know there are a lot of us out there and I like to share that stat because you are not alone.

Speaker 1:

Okay, so this is what I did when I actually journaled all of my. I sat and processed it for a couple of days, my sadness you know how I felt and then, at a certain point, I just shook my body out of it and I realized, after those days of processing, I knew I had to go ahead and accept the reality of the situation and figure out what to do. And it sounds so much easier said than done. Because inside my mind, when I got to this point and I said, kathy, you have to figure out your reality and accept it, I was still bucking it. I was bucking it like a toddler having a tantrum. I was and this is what I was thinking, and I'm going to kind of do it like a toddler would. Why is this happening to me? Why is this continuing to happen? I just want to be better. We pay all this money for health insurance and care and no one can heal Dennis. Kicking and screaming, that's what I felt. Like a toddler on the floor, kicking and screaming and just saying why, why, why, and I don't want to do this anymore and I don't, and somebody should be able to fix this right.

Speaker 1:

But you and I know that staying in the state of mind will not make things better. It's actually going to rob us of our joy, rob us of the good things and rob us, most importantly, of our health. Yeah, and so we have to control it. So you have to move to acceptance. It's one of the most significant struggles we face accepting life's current state. It's hard for me to accept Dennis's current state. We're moving into almost seven and a half years and so we're moving into this.

Speaker 1:

And when it comes to your loved one, dealing with chronic illnesses, terminal illnesses or aging parents, we have to accept it. We have to accept the reality. You know the metaphor when life gives you lemons, you're supposed to make lemonade. Do you know that? And if you would have told me this when I was doing this piece, I would have just like okay, if life throws me lemons, I'm going to throw them right back at you. I'm going to throw them right back at you. But what if the lemons never stop falling, my friend? Lemons never stop falling, my friend. What if every day brings a new challenge, a new burden, making it impossible to catch your breath and find that moment to make your own lemonade? Terminal illness, aging parents, alzheimer's, mls, cancer, brain cancer I'm probably missing, you know, waiting on a donation or waiting on a transplant, you know waiting for a donor. You know it feels that way.

Speaker 1:

The lemons represent the ongoing responsibilities we carry, the emotional strain and the physical demands that never seem to cease. Demands that never seem to cease, whether it's managing medical appointments, providing daily care or dealing with the emotional toll of watching your loved one decline. The challenges are continuous and that's your reality, or that's my reality right now. That was my reality watching my dad, watching my mom. Right now, I feel this worrying about everything, which is exhausting and emotionally drained. Can you relate?

Speaker 1:

So what I had to do is find a way, and so I wanted to lean into ways to build resilience, to cope and find small amounts of joy. I had to go back and dust off some of the talks that I did on this podcast about small moments of joy. If you are here, I suggest you brainstorm what works for you, too. What can bring you joy? Storm what works for you, too. What can bring you joy? Just take a piece of paper. What is going to work right now for you? You may not be able to take this luxurious vacation due to financial situations, or you can't leave your loved one due to their illness for long periods of time. Maybe it's joining a support group, maybe it's going back to therapy, maybe it's taking a yoga class. Things that worked in the past, though, remember, may need to be adjusted or tweaked. I certainly realize this.

Speaker 1:

For me, I continue to have my calls with my sister or FaceTimes with my sister. During the week, I talk to my girlfriend Julie, we go bowling. I have accountability partners in my business and so I realized that I needed to have different talks with my friends and my sister. My spouse and I are having different conversations right now, and when I say different I'm like they're helping me through some of the issues, but then I say okay, I'm setting some boundaries, to say, can we talk about a fun thing or can we? You know, like my sister and I talked about our past, we talked about some funny things. Tell me a time when you, like my grandson, got, we had really bad ice and my little grandson didn't think about waiting for the bus and watching the ice and so he fell and he scunned his front of his face up really bad. And so my sister and I were talking about tell me about a time when your kids got hurt bad, and so she was sharing some stories about those bumps and bruises your kids get and we were laughing at some of them and we were reminiscing and it just brought us to a different place.

Speaker 1:

I've also taken up now painting for fun right now. When Dennis was in a stem cell transplant, I did adult coloring because I could just kind of color and do stuff. Well, I went out and bought this paint by number thing and it's really cool, but I wanted something where I didn't have to do too much creatively and think so it's easier to just pick out the number sevens, find the paint that's labeled number seven and go paint in all the number sevens and then go on to the number eight and paint in number eight. It's easier, but I'm finding that it's like I can do this for hours. I'm putting down my phone, I'm forgetting about everything, and so that has helped, and I've also I should have probably said this earlier I'm leaning into other caregivers this time and leaning into prior interviews that I had and asking them questions about you know, do you have any suggestions? And he went like Dr JJ or Helen from the Heart of Hospice and just asking them questions on what do you have for suggestions for me? So yeah, so just remember that sometimes the greatest act of love is just finding your spirit, is letting yourself rest, letting yourself find out what you need to fill your joy, and so you have to go ahead and brainstorm these out.

Speaker 1:

Accepting your current state of life while caregiving is undeniably tough, especially when the challenges seem never, never ending. But even in the midst of the relentless lemons and you just want to throw them back and you're tired of making lemonade. Finding ways to nurture your own well-being can make a significant difference. I mean just simple things like a while back, my sister and I went to a movie. It was just a little time to get away. Sure, I was worried, but you know what? I'm only a phone call away Now.

Speaker 1:

Accepting our reality is a huge step, but it's just the beginning, when we then need to transition to those steps of commitment to our own personal well-being and our own personal care, and so that's an important piece during this time. Like I said, for me it's adjusting and tweaking. Now I had to assess what's working, like my walks and gratitude journaling, but I realized I needed conversations, I needed therapy, I needed quiet time. My son said something to me this weekend. We went and saw my granddaughter's play and it was really, really good, but he had said that the disease and caregiving can consume your inner identity. It becomes your identity, and it was like, oh, that's an aha moment.

Speaker 1:

So this transition isn't just about finding time for ourselves. It's about redefining who we are, beyond the caregiving roles, and overcoming the emotional barriers that come with us, and I had to reflect on what I do in times of challenges. I really had to and work through how I process them and teach myself how to let go of the unhealthy emotions, thoughts and feelings, what, you know, do I really need to go ahead? And, you know, beat myself up for not going ahead and doing my workout this morning because I was sad. Instead could I just have my cup of coffee and sit, those kind of things. Here are some thoughts to consider and I love these and I just kind of pulled these together in no random order, but then I'm going to give you one and then I'm going to give you an example. You know, think about the bond you share with your loved one, which is deep and enduring. The emotional attachment makes it incredibly difficult to distance yourself, even when you know it's necessary for your own well-being to get away. Letting go, whether it's physically, whether it's more often, even temporarily, can feel like betraying that bond, and I was just reminded of this this week, again, I didn't Dennis had two days, or last week, dennis had two days of chemotherapy.

Speaker 1:

The first day involves labs, doctor and one of the drugs in his chemotherapy infusion he had an allergic reaction to, and so I want to be there for day one and sit with him and what I do is I go to the cafeteria and buy him a meal while he's getting just his low dose drugs, and so he gets a good meal in him before the tough stuff hits. And so we have a meal together, side by side in the infusion chair, and I bring it in for him. But on day two I don't go in. It's only an hour and a half. I don't go in because he goes, walks right to the infusion chair, he gets the nurse that goes ahead and does his pre-meds and then he gets his one chemotherapy drug and I drop him off at the door and I pick him up at the door. He usually sleeps during that time. But I need that hour, hour and a half, for myself. I do, I do, and this time what I did is I went to Target and I bought rugs for my bathroom and just walked around and snooped and then came back and I waited in the car. I could have walked in, but for my own health and well-being I wanted to release myself from that day. He's got the care. So I did that and I'm training myself to do that more. I did that during Dennis's stem cell transplant therapy too. As he improved, I didn't need to be there every day.

Speaker 1:

Another thing I want to talk about is this fear. There's a fear that by taking time for yourself, you might neglect your loved one or that they might suffer more. This fear can be paralyzing and make it hard to take the first step towards personal fulfillment. You know, like I said, why do we fear taking time for ourself? Getting away? Can we have somebody visit your loved one and then you get away? Can we go to that movie with my friend or my sister, knowing that you know we go at the right time, where Dennis is usually taking a nap or it's. You know he's had a good season or a week for his chemotherapy and I have my phone. I have my phone, I can put it on vibrate so if something would go wrong, I'm not that far away. You know, trying to go ahead and I almost say, try to do short things and small things, that you're kind of testing the boundaries and then you're going to grow and grow and grow.

Speaker 1:

Another one is I want to talk about this grieving piece where we're grieving, relationship changes as your caregiver role evolves, so does your relationship with your loved one, you might grieve the loss of the dynamics you once had, whether it was more carefree or more equal. Adjusting to these changes is a significant emotional hurdle. I know I could probably rattle off 50 things that I grieve about my relationship with Dennis right now. I mean, there are so many things like the strength he had. I'm struggling with this one the most. This has been something I sweep under the rug a lot. I miss going out more often. I miss being active with him. He would be the one where I would have to go ahead and try to keep up with him. I mean, I'm only five foot two and he's five foot 11. So, and when we would go to the gym together, he would be the competitive one. I miss the intimacy that we had.

Speaker 1:

Right now I'm grieving it but also embracing that this hurt is just our strong love that we have and I'm not going to go ahead and grieve it as sadness. I'm just going to grieve it as oh yeah, that's the love memories that I need to go ahead and take care of. I keep journaling gratitude for all of those reminders and memories and the way my brain is telling me and I'm looking at the new joy and praying on it. Just the conversations and the things that he says. Oh, it's going to make me cry, so I don't want to take too much of this bit. Just the things that he says. I'm worried about leaving you, he says, because there's so much to handle in this house for you. I'm worried about what's going to happen to you. And as much as it makes me sad, it is pure love and pure joy that's coming out of his mouth right now. It's a new type of intimacy that we have. Now I can't even see my notes because my eyes are watering so much, but you know, this is what it is. This is part of the process that we go through. So now, how do I transition to the next thing?

Speaker 1:

But caregiving can sometimes overshadow our personal interests and hobbies too, and so I'm changing pieces here and I'm really struggling with it. But we need to go ahead and redefine our personal identity as well. Do you get this? You see someone in the store and they like say, or your neighbor outside and I said this before, I talked about this before but they say you say hi, and usually I see my neighbor and I'm like gosh, gosh, your lawn looks amazing. It looks great. Or I see the neighbor down the street with the dogs and I'm like how are those fur babies? I see them barking at me through the window and I'm always smiling because I feel like they're saying hi to me and the first words that they say is how is Dennis doing?

Speaker 1:

And your identity right now is a caregiver. Is your identity dual? Do you identify as something else as well? Are you proud that you're a caregiver? Hopefully you are, but you also want to be recognized as another person or as your own person. So maybe you are thinking about. You can tell I'm having a hard time recouping this, but bear with me, friend, bear with me. Let's say there's another way that you now figure out your new identity, or you figure out how you can build your identity as a caregiver. Maybe you think about I'm going to go to that lunch that I'm invited to or that fundraiser that you're passionate about, or you deny that because you can't as a caregiver. Or you deny that because you can't as a caregiver. What if you really thought about it? And you can and you should go to that. Or maybe you've sang in the choir and you've said no for the last six months because of your loved one and realize you know what. I can figure out a way. I'm going to go on Sundays and I'm going to plan on Sundays. I just have to figure out what needs to be done from a caregiving perspective, and people see you now as the choir singer and a caregiver.

Speaker 1:

Now it's hard to rediscover what makes you happy outside of caregiving too. So you're going to start working on that as well, because, remember, your loved ones is in a position where it's chronic, they're aging, and this is really hard for me to say. You're not giving up on your caregiving, but you're trying to build your identity outside of caregiving as well, because you know eventually what the outcome could be. Now it's time to discover what makes you happy outside of caregiving, whether it's painting, hiking, reading. I have to rediscover what I can do, because my spouse can't do everything anymore. So I have to rediscover what I can do because my spouse can't do everything anymore. So I have to rediscover that Reconnecting with these activities can help you rebuild your sense of self.

Speaker 1:

You've probably pushed away or lost connections with others as well. Maybe you have to reestablish those connections or find new connections now. Maybe it's time. I think that my girlfriend Julie did that with me with bowling. She knew that when and this was in the midst of hospice care for my mom she knew that I needed an outlet. She knew that I needed to go ahead and have these connections because my mom was in hospice. Reconnecting with friends and family outside of your caregiving role is going to be essential. These relationships provide a support system that reminds you of who you are beyond being a caregiver as well, and they're a good resource to have you know and a support system to have during the process as well. But it's nice to be able to say oh, I can't wait to go ahead and hear you know my friend's story of how her job interview went and I can't wait to go to lunch to find out you know how her new career and whatever is going you know, so you can go ahead and be able to do that.

Speaker 1:

Now there's going to be a moment of coping with fear and guilt during this time, especially when your loved one's dealing with intense challenges and you're going through this. But it's natural to feel guilty for wanting time for yourself. It's natural to feel this guilt. You might worry that taking a break means you're not fully committed to your loved one's care, and that is so, so wrong. However, self-care isn't selfish. It's a necessity for sustaining your ability to care effectively and to be present and get rid of the sadness once in a while and be able to release that and then come back to your loved one with a positive or a different shift in your thoughts. And another point I want to make is it's about your fear, and fear that personal fulfillment equates to neglecting your loved one is common, and prioritizing your well-being ensures that you remain strong and present. It's about finding a balance that honors both your needs and their needs, and so releasing that fear and guilt is something that you want to work on.

Speaker 1:

So let's talk about how you can navigate this season, and I have some practical steps that I think is going to really help you. First of all, acknowledge your feelings. Just acknowledge how you're feeling. Recognize and accept the emotions you're experiencing. If you're crabby today, say okay, I'm not myself today. Why Be your own therapist? It's okay to feel conflicted and acknowledge these feelings, and acknowledging these feelings is the first steps towards healing.

Speaker 1:

Then you're going to want to set boundaries, and establish clear boundaries can help you allocate time for yourself without feeling guilty. Like I said before, test it, do something, do a little bit. You know, my clear boundary is a walk, do a little bit. My clear boundary is a walk. My clear boundary is nine o'clock bedtime. Unless something is, I want to stay up and watch, but I've really done that. My clear boundary is making time for my sister's calls, making time for my bowling time. Now it's you know, I'm going to take time and paint. This might mean scheduling regular breaks or delegating certain caregiving tasks to others. You know, when I was caregiving for my mom, it was like I needed to have clear boundaries to go ahead and recharge. And so I would ask my brother hey, can you take mom here today, or can you visit her today, or whatever it would be, so I could have a break, okay. The next one is so we have acknowledge your feelings, set boundaries.

Speaker 1:

Third one is seek support. Joining support groups or seeking professional counseling can provide you with the tools, encouragement, needed to navigate this season. Yeah, and if you're the person that finds therapy helpful, do it. If you're the person that loves group support, do it. If you're not, find a confident, find another caregiver, find a close friend, tell them what you need and tell them that you want to go ahead and bounce some thoughts off of them. Sharing your experiences with others who understand can be incredibly healing. Make sure that if you are doing it with a friend, though, tell them. You know I want you to listen. This is the only thing is. You don't have to solve my problem. I don't want you to solve anything. I don't want you to carry the guilt of or the sadness that I'm sharing. I just want you to listen, and you know so you need to go ahead and figure out where your support is going to be.

Speaker 1:

Number four is reconnect your passions. We had talked about this. Dedicate time to activities that bring you joy and fulfillment, whether it's a hobby you once loved or something new. These activities can help you rediscover your personal identity, whatever it would be. Test things out, try a group, try something new. Rebuild relationships is number five. Reconnect with family and friends who support you outside of your caregiving. These relationships can boost your emotional well-being.

Speaker 1:

Number six and you probably see this a lot from me is look at inspiring quotes, and really look at those, and maybe it's affirmations or quotes, but here's one you owe yourself the love that you see freely I messed it up. You owe yourself love that you so freely give to others. Yeah, you owe yourself that love. Yeah, and I have, like I said in previous podcasts, I have quotes, I have a quote flip calendar, I have quotes of the day sent to me. I have words throughout my house, on posters, on boards, on pictures, that sort of thing. Keep feeding yourself whatever inspiration you need. Maybe your inspiration isn't a quote, maybe it's you listen to somebody, maybe it's a daily prayer, whatever it would be, because, according to the American Psychology Association, 60% of caregivers experience significant levels of stress, significant levels of stress, and to combat that, you have to find inspiration Now. To close, today, as we wrap up today, I want to leave you with some heartfelt encouragement.

Speaker 1:

Being a caregiver is a journey filled with immense love, dedication and, at times, overwhelming challenges. It's the rewards, but it's also all of the challenges. It's essential to remember that it's okay to feel the full range of emotions that come with this role, and boy you and I have. We felt them right. Itestruck, I'm awestruck at how this journey has taught me so much about myself. I know you feel the same way. But, first and foremost, I want you. When you're in this situation. I want you to grant yourself grace. Give yourself the grace to process everything you're experiencing. Don't push it away. Don't think it's something wrong with yourself. It's natural to feel a mix of emotions sadness, frustration, anger, resentment, hope and even moments of joy. But recognizing and accepting these thoughts and feelings, you honor your own humility and the incredible strength you possess.

Speaker 1:

Once you've knowledge where you're at emotionally, take a moment to reflect. Think about the small steps you can take to adjust and refine your own well-being during this challenging time. It might be as simple as dedicating 10 minutes a day to a hobby you love. Maybe you love to crochet, maybe you love to watch a comedy. Reaching out to a friend for a heartfelt conversation might be another one. Or practice mindfulness to center your thoughts, whether it's prayer, meditation, yoga.

Speaker 1:

Rebuilding your identity outside of caregiving is a gradual process, but it's entirely possible. My friend, start by finding moments of joy and resilience in your daily life, whether it's painting, walking in nature, reading a book. Whether it's painting, walking in nature, reading a book, these activities can help you reconnect with who you are and beyond your caregiving role. Remember, seeking joy and fulfillment for yourself doesn't diminish your love or your dedication as a caregiver. In fact, it enhances your ability to provide care with a resilient and compassionate heart. By nurturing your own well-being, you're not only sustaining your giving spirit, but also creating a healthier and more balanced life for both yourself and your loved one more balanced life for both yourself and your loved one. You are not alone on this journey. Reach out, I'm a text away. Share your story. Lean on supportive networks that you have or other caregivers. I love the fact that those two fan mail Sabrina and the other person. They were looking for resources and they found this podcast.

Speaker 1:

I'm working on something in spring that I'm going to go ahead and bring back a community again. I did it way back, oh gosh, two years ago. It was the Caregiver Circle. Well, that's going to be coming back in a different way. It's going to be outside of the social media posts which we all fear because we don't want other people to read ours, and I'm going to be working on that. But together we can create a community of caregivers who uplift and empower one another. So stay tuned on that. But together we can create a community of caregivers who uplift and empower one another, so stay tuned for that.

Speaker 1:

So, as I end today, I want to first of all thank you for joining me on this episode. You heard my flubs, you heard my cries, you heard my sniffles. I don't edit this podcast because it has to be authentic, it has to be real, it has to be just Kathy talking to you. It's not something that's formal. So thank you for joining the Caregiver Cup podcast.

Speaker 1:

I want to say, if you found this helpful, if you haven't already followed me, hit that follow button and get it every week from me. I haven't missed a week in four plus years, so I'm always going to be your solid person here that you can listen to. If you have requests don't forget that that text message is there you can go ahead and do that. And if you wouldn't mind to help me get this out to more caregivers, if you write a review or share it with others, that's going to help me tremendously.

Speaker 1:

So, to end today, take a deep breath, be kind to yourself and remember that every small step you take towards your own well-being is a victory. Right now, if you were able to wash your face and brush your teeth this morning and you couldn't do it yesterday, that's a victory. If you were able to go ahead and take a walk around the block, that's a victory. So until next time, my friend, stay strong, take care and remember filling your cup first is the most important love that you can give to your loved one and to yourself. We'll talk to you again next week, my friend. Bye for now.